THE HACK

“Forget about someone’s resume or how they present themselves at a party. Can they blog or not?” - Nick Denton

Open new blank document.

A snappy title to lure people in and then I’m rocking and rolling - filling the laptop screen with whatever my brain can come up with this time.

Progress is slow at first, with just a few drips from the creative tap gracing me with their presence but things quickly build up to a fuller flow until eventually the words are pouring out faster than my fingers can type them.

“Do you have to do that in bed?” I hear Lydia ask, before she rolls over onto her back beside me and pushes her little eye mask up onto her forehead, “It’s two in the morning for Christ’s sake. How am I supposed to get any sleep with you tapping away like a manic woodpecker next to me?”

“I’m taking advantage of the benefits of working from home”, I say, snuggling a little deeper into the soft stack of pillows propping me up.

“You’re taking the piss is what you’re doing”, she says.

“Well I can’t control when the muse is going to hit me”, I say.

“This table lamp is about to hit you in a minute”, says Lydia, rolling back onto her side in disgust, “Just type ‘The End’ or whatever, and call it a night.”

“You don’t actually type ‘The End’ on things like this, you know. That’s more of a fiction thing.”

“I don’t care, I’m asleep”, says Lydia, pulling her eye mask back down to block out the light.

“I just need a few more minutes, I promise”, I say, “I’m on a roll here.”

“You’re going to be on the sofa if this goes on much longer.”

“I’m just at a crucial point where I’m discussing how so many true artists are languishing in obscurity these days while the only voices with any power anymore are the bloggers and vloggers.”

“So why aren’t you blogging and vlogging?” says Lydia, pulling the covers over her head and getting comfortable, “The Internet isn’t going away. So maybe you should try to evolve instead of waiting for extinction.”

There is a long pause while the harsh reality of that statement sinks in.

“You’re probably right to steer clear of the digital realm with your essay style, though”, Lydia continues, finally breaking the silence, “People want brevity online, not a lot of fluff.”

“I thought you were supposed to be asleep?” I say.